To be completely honest, I probably should have read this book years ago. But it wasn't until I was inspired by my summer camp kids to read it and see what all the fuss was about. And let me tell you, my breath has been stolen. This book was amazing for so many reasons, and I feel the best way to do this review is by giving you 13 reasons why you need to read this book!
But first, a quick summary: Clay Jensen returns home from high school one day to find a mysterious package on his front door with no return address, and his name on it. After taking it inside, he discovers that within there's a shoe box with 7 cassette tapes with the sides numbered 1-13. Curiosity takes the best of him and finds a way to play the first tape and discovers that the tapes are from Hannah Baker, his crush who recently committed suicide. The first thing she claims is that "if you are listening to these tapes, you are one of the reasons why I killed myself." Thinking it's some kind of sick joke, Clay quickly stops the tape and takes a moment to think. How could he be one of the reasons? He never did anything to hurt her. If anything he was in love with her. So why did these tapes end up on his front porch? The only place he could get his answer was on those tapes. Throughout one night, Clay listens to the tapes, following Hannah through her story both in spirit and physically as he walks through their town to visit landmarks where the stories took place. Every tape took him closer to Hannah's final moments, and the pain of hearing her suffering changed the way he saw his school, classmates, town, and himself.
13 Reasons Why you should read this book:
1. Suicide isn't going anywhere: Let's be honest. Suicide has happened from the dawn of time and will continue to happen unless we find some impossible way of stopping people from killing themselves. So we might as well talk about it. The way Jay Asher tells this story truly captures this subject from so many angles. Hannah tells you her story, and in turn, you are forced to walk her path towards the final day of her life, learning along the way why she can no longer stay among the living. Let's stop the taboo, that way people will feel lost when the choice appears as a viable solution to their problems.
2. Educate yourself: According to suicide.org, there are many symptoms that may be shown by a person who's considering suicide. They may be but are not limited to:
Appearing depressed or sad most of the time. (Untreated depression is the number one cause of suicide.)
Talking or writing about death or suicide.
Withdrawing from family and friends.
Feeling hopeless.
Feeling helpless.
Feeling strong anger or rage.
Feeling trapped -- like there is no way out of a situation.
Experiencing dramatic mood changes.
Abusing drugs or alcohol.
Exhibiting a change in personality.
Acting impulsively.
Losing interest in most activities.
Performing poorly at work or in school.
Giving away prized possessions.
Writing a will.
Feeling excessive guilt or shame.
Acting recklessly.
Not surprisingly enough, Hannah shows many of these symptoms, both in Clay's memories and in her confessions. By adding these small details, it was a sad reminder that these signs are clear in retrospect, and nearly impossible to see in the moment.
3. Reputation isn't everything. You can't let what other people say about you, define who you are. Some of the things that Hannah faced in her school all started because of a rumor and the way it started the snowball effect on her reputation. Having graduated from school not that long ago, I can still clearly remember how reputation was so important to most teens. Sometimes it was the driving force for how you dress, who you hang out with, or what you do. This can be both good and bad, and when it becomes toxic, it can ruin a person for the rest of their lives. You saw this in the different characters along with Hannah. Everyone in some way was thinking about themselves and not the others around them, including Hannah, and it affected those around them just as much as it affected themselves.
4. Know when you are being a bully or crossing a line. This is something I feel the book reflects well on too. How can someone do certain things and just shrug it off? Don't you care that what you are doing is wrong? Does it secretly bother you or do you brush it off like an ant on your shoe? Part of seeing those specific characters do the actions depicted in the story made me sick...not because of the way it is written, but because I can actually remember people from my own life that were like that and some that were perhaps even capable of some of the things. Sometimes life is stranger than fiction.
5. Think before you act. There were many instances where I wanted to yell at Hannah. I felt Clay's frustration as I listened to her story. There were so many moments where she could have turned around and done something else. She knew that being around certain people would not be good for her, yet she did anyway. It's hard to feel sorry for someone when they don't even try to help themselves. Some may argue it's because at that point she had already given up, but she only made things worse by letting herself be in those situations.
6. Everything affects everything. Truly one of my favorite lines from the book. Cause and effect. I enjoyed how every tap led to the next. The timeline was perfectly thought out and I enjoyed it thoroughly. You learn about her story but at the same time, you also become aware of her train of thought in the process of creating the tapes to begin with. The fact that her life is going on at the same time as she comes to terms with her choice and the creation of the tapes just gives a whole new level to self-reflection from a character's perspective.
7. It's okay to ask for help. Hannah truly struggled with asking for help, which was something that drove Clay crazy too. We are all human, and asking for help is the hardest thing to do when you need it most. When we struggle with it and don't, that's how we fall even faster into the helpless pit of despair. I feel that's something that Hannah faced. She couldn't find the right way to ask for help, and when she finally asked for help, she didn't know how to ask the right questions or what to say. This leads me to...
8. The first person you reach out to may not be your only solution. I mean in one way or another, you will finally reach out...but what if that doesn't work out? Don't give up on the first try... especially if you are doing it as your last resort. That's something that really upset me (just as it did Clay) how when Hannah went to her counselor for help. Of course, it's hard to open up; sometimes the words just don't want to come out. But don't give up there. Try again. Go back, try try try. Go somewhere else. Someone else. You never know, a therapist might not be the only person that holds the right answer you seek.
9. There is always more than one side to every story. This is one of the best aspects of the book. The way Jay Asher wrote a double narrative is something I have never seen before in any other book I've read. Usually, there's an obvious separation between character minds, separated by chapters or at least page breaks, but in this book, we see both trains of thought and narration simultaneously run side by side and work like a charm. It allows us the reader to get lost in the timelines since they merge into one as Clay listens to Hannah. It feels more like you are listening to her thoughts instead of a confession. Clay constantly begs the recording as if it were Hannah herself, to stop or change her mind, to take back an action, to not give up. This complex relationship created by this double narrative adds a whole new level of emotion and connection between the characters and the readers.
10. Take responsibility for yourself. This one can kind of tie in with number 5, but in a way, it's to concentrate on the aftermath of a choice. Something that Hannah did often, was blame others for her bad times, however, there were certain moments where she placed herself in situations on purpose knowing the end results. When life seems tough, the only person that can change it is you. If you wait around for others, you're gonna grow old waiting. It is one of the many things you as the reader can learn from as you experience the choices the different characters make throughout the book.
11. Don't cover up for others when you know something wrong was done. Hannah didn't speak up during two very moving moments in the story. If she had, it would have changed things around her dramatically. She realized it in retrospect, but perhaps learning from other's mistakes is better than living through it firsthand because by then it might be too late. Other characters made the mistake of not intervening, or speaking up, and their actions had their own serious consequences. Doing nothing is sometimes worse than the action that isn't stopped.
12. The only person that knows what's going on in your life is you. Don't assume everyone around you knows what you're going through. Let's be honest; human beings are very selfish creatures. Without realizing it, we don't stop to think about others or how their lives are most of the time unless it's hard to ignore or affect us personally. This goes both ways, so if you are having a "rough life" like Hannah was, don't wait around hoping someone will notice. Why do you think suicide is such an issue? Most people "never saw it coming" right? We are blind to most things around us, either because we are absorbed in something else or we are in denial of the signs that others show. It's only when you look back that you see everything.
13. Love yourself even when others don't. Don't Give Up. Screw everyone else that wants to trip you, drag you down, make you feel less than yourself, or anything else that is negative or affects your self-worth. Love yourself. Don't give up on yourself. "After every storm, there's a rainbow", and "The night is darkest before dawn", there's a reason for these sayings... hold on and pull through, and you will see the beauty in the world around you. It's yours for the taking, so don't let someone else take it from you. Love yourself, you are loved by someone else too, and just in case, know I love you too. Spread the love.
I give this book a 4.9 out of 5. Reality is stranger than fiction, and I strongly believed this was a close second to reality. A must-read!
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